Wednesday, July 29, 2009

she used to tie her hair up in ribbons and bows

"I woke up from a nightmare that I could not stand to see,
You were wandering out on the hills of Iowa and you were not thinking of me." -Dar Williams

The other night I had a dream that I found an entire stack of old pictures of my grammy. Ones where she was just a girl.
I just can't seem to let the dream go. I keep thinking of one of the photos she was riding a bike. It's funny, I never saw her ride a bike, I am not sure if she ever did.

Guiding Light, my "story", is ending: it's a soap opera we always would talk about whenever we visited or on phone calls. I am honestly emotional about a soap opera that I've watched all my life being over, because it was "our" thing, one of our touchstones. Every night as I watch my DVR'd episode from that day I wonder if she is catching up on it too. I want to ask her if she wants Reva to end up with Josh or Jeffrey.

There's just never enough time, is there? There will always be more that you want to talk about, more that you want to do together, more that you want to say.
Love.You.Grandma.XOX

3 comments:

mindakims said...

Aw honey! I feel the same way about my gram. Sorry about your Soap opera, its hard to give up an institution in our lives!

Ashley said...

love you.
xoxo

Tami said...

not sure what to say, we are grieving here as well, my mom's husband, grandpa dave, passed away last weekend. to see anna and will deal with it all just breaks my heart. xoxo